Maybe This Was Redirection…
Maybe the flow of the wind had other plans for me
Hello beautiful humans 😇,
A few days ago, I was on a high while away on a weekend trip. I felt like I was getting a glimpse into the life I’ve been wanting to create for myself, and just as I was coming back home to rest and starting my therapy appointment, I received a notification. It read that I had received an offer letter for a job that I recently applied to.
I was over the moon and felt like things were shifting in my favor. I thought to myself, maybe this is the turning point I’ve been waiting for.
After therapy, I quickly read over the offer letter and agreement and decided to do something brave, which was advocate for myself by asking for higher pay and getting clarification on the job schedule. I felt so proud of myself for doing so and told a few trusted friends the good news and that I was in the negotiation process.
I went to bed feeling on cloud nine, thanking the universe for this divine shift. It felt like all the internal work I had been doing for years was finally starting to pay off.
The next day, I was happy, editing my videos and deciding to finally bite the bullet and purchase this website! Right after I purchased it and published it live, I received a notification on my laptop from the company I interviewed for.
I happily went to look over the email with a big smile on my face that slowly started to drop the more I read.
The offer was rescinded.
I advocated for myself… was this a bad idea? What did I do wrong?
I thought things were finally changing in my favor?
I’m so embarrassed! I already told people close to me that I received an offer!
“I admire you advocating for yourself and not just blindly signing.”
That was a compliment, so why?
The schedule wasn’t what I thought it was. The pay negotiation was unmovable.
This wouldn’t give me the stability I’m looking for. The life I’m trying to create with multiple streams of income supporting me.
I immediately messaged my friend saying:
“BROOOOOOOOOOOO I’M SO EMBARRASSED.”
They consoled me and reminded me of something I know deep down. I did the right thing by advocating for myself, and this is simply a redirection to something more aligned with my long-term goals.
I know my friend was right, and I know that everything is working out for me behind the scenes, but I’m still human, so I get sad.
My mood and energy levels slowly lowered as the evening went on, and I allowed myself to feel it. I went to sleep trying to release the tension and ended up sleeping in.
I woke up feeling lighter, and yes, I may still be a little bummed about the situation, but in a weird way, this also inspired me to write my first blog post.
I am choosing to trust that this is not a rejection, but a redirection.
If I took on that role, it wouldn’t have pushed me closer to the solid foundation I wanted. I would have been settling.
I think the lesson the universe is trying to teach me is:
Not to settle just because that’s the only option in front of you.
Know your worth and don’t be afraid to vocalize it by asking for higher pay and more.
Advocate for yourself and ask questions to make sure you know the full scope of what you’re signing up for.
Thank you, Universe, for the lesson. I know this is all for my greatest good, but DANG, it still hurts my feelings sometimes haha.
For the person reading this, I hope this message makes you feel less alone. Remember, maybe this was redirection…
Sending lots of love,
Destiny 💗
